frenemies

Anytime I tell someone "don't hate", usually I'm saying it in a joking manner. Honestly, I cannot wrap my mind around the idea of someone actually hatin'/jealous/envious of me. ESPECIALLY when my life ain't been no crystal stair. But then to think that one of these people is "supposed" to be my friend makes me wonder...what value are we really bringing into each other's lives? Interpersonal relationships are investments that should appreciate with time, right?

If a friend wants to emulate a particular quality of mine, then cool. All of my friends have something within their character that I wish were mature in mine...whether it be their compassion, their laissez faire, their spirituality, their financial savvy, or anything of the like. Basically, if we're learning and growing b/c of our relationship, then that's the beauty of it.

However, you have those that would prefer to rise above you than grow with you, or in other words, "1 up" you. These insecure people need to be validated by having or being more. They sell the perception that they're better or more connected than you are in one area or many. Oftentimes, they are very passive aggressive with that sh*t...as if there's some sort of silent competition, one that I haven't been formerly invited to compete. But I MUST be winning, even in my mental absence, b/c truth be told...I'm not really thinking about them.

I'm 30 years old. I do not know everything. I'm only as wise as my experiences and at 30, whose to say that I qualify to be anybody's Op.rah. I just try to do what works for me and mine. Everyone should be true to themselves b/c in the end THAT makes the difference between being happy and being content. I still have a lot to learn, but one thing is certain...I am special b/c MY GOD AND I SAID SO. Everyone else is free to do and believe what they want. Their accomplishments are no barometer for my own ability or value, b/c I do not flourish inside boxes or under glass ceilings.

Frenemy, your salvation or freedom are not in my grasp. As honored as I am that you would exaggerate MY importance, it is a waste of time trying to prove something to me.