what did I agree to?

I figured that I might as well write tonight since I have been horrible at updating on even a semi-regular basis. This whole day has been kinda blah. I know that I should be excited about having a new job and embarking on a new opportunity, but my heart isn't here. Maybe I'll be able to make a better assessment once J returns and we get back into the swing of things together. But for right now, as I wash clothes and ponder what am I to do for lunch tomorrow, I keep thinking that I sold my soul to the devil just to pay the bills.

Don't get me wrong...I have been trying to get "on" with this firm since the day after I was downsized. It is well-established with a great reputation. My responsibilities will still be design-intensive within the same discipline. The only real difference is project diversity...which is fine. My first 2 days really didn't offer a clear picture of what it would feel like to work there since I was in training most of the day. With the fast turn-around, I haven't been able to occupy my cubicle b/c it has yet to be set up for me. Again, I'm surrounded by men, but they are a lot younger than what I'm used to and very welcoming. My supervisor appears to be easy-going and accomodating. I can't really knock the benefits and whereas I would've had to swallow a 5% pay cut at my old firm (had they not decided to cut me altogether), I will receive more than a 5% increase here.

What is my problem???

J wants to come back and prefers his Richmond school. He even called me at 7-something in the morning once to ask if he can return to his same afterschool care. His friends on the block keep knocking on my door, as if I were lying about J not being here. His drama teacher emailed me today, informing me of the anticipated schedule and wondering if he and I were still here. I mean, it seems as if it were only right that he be here.

Right when I was walking around in this whole blues-y fog, my dad calls to tell me that a doctor in the N.O. diagnosed J with a mild version of the sw.ine flu, gave him a prescription and sent him on his way. Apparently, he's had a fever since Friday, has been complaining of headaches, his sinuses or something has been draining, and he's been laying around with little energy. Now, I'm not there...I haven't talked to a doctor and haven't seen my child in weeks; yet, my dad is telling me NOT to worry. He can't go to school for the next 7 days and all air travel is out so undoubtedly, he will not be back in VA in time to start school. He hasn't been cleared to go anywhere until his birthday, September 7th.

When I spoke with J last, he was a little better. His fever had broken, he has an appetite but he said that his head hurt everytime that he coughed. According to my dad, the doctor said that the worse may be over. The media has really hyped this virus up so much that I couldn't even acknowledge the word "mild". I'm only familiar with worse case scenarios. I've done some online research and have read some journals of parents with children close to J's age with similar symptoms and by day 3 of their quarantine, they were feeling much better and too bored to stay at home from school. So, reading that helped. I guess the part that's bothering me the most, at this moment, is that I'm not there...but he has 3 nurses at home caring for him, his PawPaw leading the pack.

For a while, I wondered if this was some kind of sign...or maybe I wanted it to be. It is certainly reason enough for me to drop everything and go back down there. I don't know. I pray that J is swinging from the ceiling fans by Tuesday and that I feel better about this new beginning by the end of the week.

new business

MONDAY, August 24th

Scene: Conference Room at local engineering firm. I'm sitting at a long table, across from 2 company supervisors, doing what I termed a "practice" interview. (I was already told that the firm was in a holding pattern; plus, I already planned to do the contract job in DC until December.)

Mr. Rob: If you don't hear from me by the end of the week, then give me a call next week. I should be able to tell you where the company stands, but DO know that we still are in a holding pattern.

Having heard this before, I was unphased. Plus, I didn't really care.

TUESDAY, August 25th

Scene: Mr. Rob leaves a message on both my home and cell phones. I assume that he's contacting me b/c I left something out from that load of paperwork that they threw at me during my "practice" interview. I return his call.

Me: Hi, Mr. Rob...I'm returning your call.
Mr. Rob: Yes, what a difference 24 hours make. Actually, less than 24 hours. So, we briefly discussed salary yesterday, but I'd like to make you an offer with a base salary of _________. Of course that doesn't include overtime, bonuses, and other benefits. How does that sound?
Me: **stunned** Uh...yes, that sounds fine.
Mr. Rob: Here's the catch...can you start tomorrow? There's a software training that I'd like you to attend.
Me: Tomorrow??? Uh...

WEDNESDAY, August 26th

HR Rep, Dee: Congratulations and welcome to Engineering Firm A.

THURSDAY, August 27th

Software Trainer, Neal: So, you've been here 2 days and had a lot of information thrown at you. How do you feel?

My heart is still in N.ew Or.leans, but I decided to hang out on the east coast a little longer than planned. As for the contract job in DC, it was agreed that I could possibly do that on the side for some extra cash. Possibly. The owner and I will keep in touch and may still try to iron out a deal that gets me back home one day, running the show. In the meantime, I'm getting my baby back and we're gonna turn this house back into a home.

the curly girl wonder diaries

Well, I'm a week late and many dollars short, but here's my 2-month update:

Month 0

Month 2

I couldn't quite recreate the head tilt and sepiatone (that I desperately needed b/c I am currently suffering from some sort of eye trauma which is rather unsightly), but its safe to say that I've achieved growth. (Am I almost there, Terry?!) I'm ready for my close-up...

Honestly, I haven't been as good to my hair as I should've been...especially with my plane hopping. So, I haven't deep-conditioned weekly, I can't remember the last hot oil treatment that I've done, I've had another set of hands in my hair **grin**, and on occasion, I have been caught sleeping "hair-naked" b/c I was too lazy to look for my satin cap. BUT, I have done another amla/henna treatment and have researched other ayur.vedic hair care recipes. For me, I gotta beautify on a budget so as long as everything is somewhere under $5 (preferably under $3), we're cooking with gas.

I'm still about keeping things simple. My reggie hasn't changed too much. I cowash with Herbal Ess.ence Hel.lo Hydra.tion, do a quick cold rinse (which seals the hair cuticle and chills my very soul), smooth on a dollop of Herbal Ess.ence None of You.r Frizz.ness, work it through small portions with my fingers, coil my straighter strands, toothbrush my edges, and go. I've noticed that after I put the conditioner in my hair while in the shower and then put on a plastic cap and proceed to uh...shower, (before I rinse it out) helps to moisturize my coils a great deal. And the cold rinse keeps the frizz at bay, as well.

I will probably be a conditioner-only gal for the long haul. I had been reluctant to try this sample of Mis.s Jess.ie's Curl.y Butt.ercreme that I was gifted b/c of its wax-y ingredients. In addition, even though I got it for free, I wasn't too pleased with the prices if I decided to make it a staple item. Well, it did elongate my curls but the touchability factor went down 10 points by the next day...maybe even later on during that same day. I just didn't care for the way that it felt on my hair after some time. Kink.y Cur.ly Cur.ling Cus.tard (KCCC) shrinks the hell outta my hair, so that has been downgraded to a gel that I only use to smooth my baby hairs...and at the rate I'm going, I'll prolly die before I run out of that jar. But I must admit...sometimes I just like unscrewing the lid and sniffing it. A sickness, I know. Anyway...

This Month's Mythbuster:

Combing my hair doesn't have to literally involve a comb. In fact, I've only used a comb once...and I can't really recall why. I think that I was guilted into it after watching a youtube vid. So, I check "no" for using a comb to detangle. My fingers appear to be doing a great job...and so far, no one else's fingers have been harmed during hair play. Perhaps when my hair is longer, I will have to modify my methods, but for right now, if it ain't broke, why fix it?

Comment of the Month:

Can I touch it now? - New Man Friend (NMF)

I have received more compliments this month, but that question made me tingle.

Still glowing and growing,
Detangling and tingling,
Curly Girl Wonder aka LB