glamorous life

I think that I may have briefly mentioned that I like to wear flowers in my hair...at least, when I'm sober b/c I don't always make it back home with it still there. Anyways, it is usually something that draws people to me to either ask me if its real, say that it looks really pretty/summer-y or to remind me that I have a flower growing out of my head (as was said by the Prez of my company today). Point is, it brings about much attention, which is cool. I can take it or leave it.

When I went to see Boyz II Me.n a couple of weeks ago with a girlfriend (toting said flower in my hair), she didn't comment on the flower. She looked at me and said, "Do you actually do your hair everyday?" I looked at her kinda strange...gave her a pass since I hadn't seen her in a while, but what kind of question is that? I, at first, thought that she was asking if I go to a hairdresser, to which I always let out a hearty "NO!" But she wanted to know if I actually curl, comb and I guess "pretty up" my hair everyday. Now, if I'm not going anywhere...well, I may not worry about impressing my four walls. But aside from that, my question is..."when is it ok to NOT put any effort towards looking presentable?"

For me, it's not so much about impressing anybody as it is about my taking care of myself and impressing myself when I look in the mirror in the morning. Although the compliments are nice, my looking my best is a reflection of how I'm feeling and my feeling my best is a reflection of how I'm looking. Now at my job, the dress code is business casual...but it's still business. I may wear a cute dress every once in a while, but its not about over-dressing for the part. How can one explain a nice button-down or polo, khakis or dress slacks, heels or cute flats with a messed up head? Everyone has bad hair days, but not EVERYDAY. And I can understand if a person's job has special work conditions...i.e. a lab or something similar. But when you encounter both clients and colleagues, how do you think that they perceive you if you look as if you just rolled out of bed and whichever way your hair laid when you went to sleep was the style of the day? Doesn't look very professional at all.

But I don't think that this is where she was going with this...

My girl from back home (who lives in Va) was in town for my birthday. She came to my party and then we hung out the next day. As I was curling my hair and getting ready, she walked in the bathroom and said, "You're high maintenance." I looked at her as if she cussed my momma out. I never cared to be labeled "high maintenance" b/c of the negative connotation associated with it but since when is caring about your appearance considered "high maintenance"...shouldn't it be routine maintenance? Heck, I do not go to a salon...and I have nothing against it outside of my never being able to find someone that will do or cut my hair exactly like I like it for the money that I'm paying. All I'm doing is putting some effort into looking nice. And I think that both her and my Boy.z II Men partnah have that "no fuss" mentality...not caring very much at all about how they look. And that's fine...but don't find fault with me for thinking otherwise.

Now, I can think back to a time when I had that "whateva" mentality. In fact, I can think back to more than a few times not too long ago when I was hardcore about that "whateva" mentality. But certainly, during those times, I wasn't loving "me" too much. There was either something or someone making me feel as if I was undeserving of anything positive...and I would dress down to match how I felt. But thank God, I am loving the hell outta my 30-something y/o self nowadays. And it shows. I do the make-up thing more often...I step up my shoe game from time to time, but its not about being a glamour girl or Amer.ica's Next Top Mo.del. I'm into sneakers and T-shirts, doo rags, wife beaters and sweatpants but there is a time and place for everything. But when God made me, He made me beautiful and its high-time that I recognize and preserve that.

I tend to find that when my car is clean, it almost seems as if it runs a little better. When my house is clean, it looks bigger, better and puts me in a positive mood. The same goes for my appearance. When I look nice, I feel nice. And if I must be labeled "high maintenance", then I'll own that, b/c I am about "maintaining my positive high."