the 3rd barber on the left aka the 5th one

I can't see too well and I may be hard of hearing but I can smell bull ish a mile away.

So everyone knows that during the summers, I am a free woman. My baby goes back home to the N.O. while I pretend as if I have no responsibilities for 3 months. I was explaining to the barbers, at the shop that I take J to, that we would be MIA until September. Now, the older man cuts J's hair but I'm pretty cool with 5 of them. I talk to the older guy about politics, the wannabe-black-guy about how Kanye can murder 50 Cent any day of the week with his lyrics, the shorter guy about why I don't have a man, and the one in the back about lawn care. We pretty much run the gamut of subjects during my 1 hour visit. Anyway, the 4 barbers that I mentioned are married (but 2 of them give me the impression that they would be single for one night with me). The 5th one (that I have yet to mention) is the only single guy in the place...if only he looked like Micheal Ealy, I would be in business. However, he ACTS as if he's on top of his game b/c he claims to have women all around the globe...ya know, regular barbershop bull ish.

The 5th one has been giving off rhythm since the 1st day that I took J there about a year and a half ago. But I classify barbers with construction workers...they will holla at anybody that walks by. He has been intrigued by my being from the N.O. and was shocked to learn that I actually have a brain, to accompany my cute face, when I told him what I do for a living. He seems to be most impressed by the fact that I don't have a weave...why that's considered impressive is beyond me. So when I said that I wouldn't be back until September, he gave me his number and asked that I call him so that he can provide me with some company while my baby was gone.

I wasn't going to call, but Tee convinced me that there was no harm in getting a cup of coffee with someone. I think that her main concern was that I had thrown in the towel after Jesse, who's a dumbass (just in case anyone wanted to know)...and she witnessed his dumbassery and perhaps thought that I would not recover unless I got back out there and did a couple of trial runs. I got enough practice with Promance, minus the pressure.

I call a few days later. We talked briefly. We were supposed to go out but then I got tied up with other engagements and before I knew it, a month and a half had gone by. I, then, called him to arrange dinner. He pretended as if he didn't know who I was. That was cool, but when I said my name, he really laid it on thick...as if he was searching his mental rolodex to figure out who I was. I thought that he was joking but he didn't laugh once. I got annoyed and was done. This negro bought me chocolates for Valentine's Day...and now he has selective amnesia. Cool. I wasn't mad. I just wasn't interested.

Even if "the 5th one" didn't have my name saved in his phone (which I don't believe), the 504 should've tipped him off. I figured that he was so-called paying me back for not jocking him from jump.

I go into the shop last night, having my usual convo with the barbers. But this time, my phone kept ringing, so I stepped outside to talk a few times while I waited for J to get in the chair. The 5th one goes in the back and starts calling me from an unknown number. He said, "I'm watching you and I just wanted to tell you all of the things that I want to do to you." Seriously, I did not recognize his voice and the number wasn't saved in my phone but it was an 804 area code, so the person had to know me. When I asked him who he was, he just told me to call him back when I left the loud place that I was in and hung up. I don't play with stalkers. I've been stalked by men and women and its not a sexy feeling nor is it funny. Then while I'm paying for J's haircut, I get a text talking 'bout how good I look today and if I'm "scurred" then I should say so. After much wasted time, he calls me back a few hours later to id himself.

So much for not knowing who I am. I'm just happy to be right. I'm not a hard-ass! He's still getting igged though.