this woman's work

I spent today doing everything BUT work. Tuesdays are my early days so I get, at least, an hour to myself to think before everyone starts rolling in at 8. But I scheduled my drive-thru gyne appointment (I was in and out of there in 30 minutes) for this afternoon, so I was sitting at my desk dreading that and not concentrating on too much of anything else...work-related.

J has a science project due soon. He has to build a simple machine. What happened to the quarterly 5-min oral presentations? He used to ace those. Simple machines? This SHOULD be an ace-in-the-hole for me but I am in a creative rut.

I re-read the worksheet. It states:

The project is for your child (with the help from you) to create a simple machine using any supplies you can find.

I'm thinking, this woman MUST be talking to ME...trying to REMIND ME on the slick.

When I was 10 y/o, I had to choose a bird and do a huge project for my gifted class. When I say huge, I mean, I had to write a paper, do an oral presentation, write and perform a song, create a board game that quizzed my classmates on facts learned from my presentation, and sculpt a model of the bird. It was nuts!

My mom hijacked that project. Now, this was waaaaaaayyyyyyyy back in the day...when cavemen roamed the earth and people actually went to the library and used ENCYCLOPEDIAS to do research. My mom turned me loose on the paper and didn't so much as coach me for the oral presentation. I guess b/c those were the more boring portions of the project. But the song? There was a popular creole/cajun-sounding rice commercial, at the time. She modified the lyrics, so that I was singing about a mockingbird instead. Yep, it was a stretch but I still have that song in my head to this day. She gave me the idea to base my boardgame off of Ch.utes and Lad.ders and MAY have allowed me to color some inconspicuous part on the board in the far corner. And as for the bird...she had the wise idea to do paper mache. She let me play around with the concoction and even let me place some soaked paper on the model, here and there. But when it came time to paint it after it dried, I don't remember painting anything on it aside from a black dot on his beak. Now, who do you think was more anxious to find out what my grade was?

So, I was sitting at my desk today, laughing to myself. I have this notebook that I keep with me at work. I usually write meeting notes, project ideas, things I need to remember, things I've already done, etc. and, unless I'm on vacay, I have to have an entry for everyday to keep track of my progress or else I feel out of sorts. This morning, in the quiet, I wrote down 5 things that I wanted to ask my supervisor when he got in. But when he got in, I was sketching out J's project at the bottom of that same page, scribbling notes and arrows as if this was a plan to take over the world, lol. I was trying to think of a task that he commonly does at home and a simple machine that would make that job easier.

I googled my ass off, but I couldn't find websites that did the damn project for me. It's a shame. I can find out people's addresses, phone numbers, and whether or not I should "dontdatehimgirl.com" but I can't find a flippin' "how-to" third grade science project.

I ended up settling on a design that will use 2 simple machines to pour cereal in a bowl. I figure that we'll use his Legos, some cardboard, and 'rig the other items.

I hope this mess works and I hope J cooperates...he gets on my nerves, always trying to do his own daggone projects, lol.